I Hear She's a Real Bitch by Jen Agg

I honestly just don't know what to make of this book.  No matter how I think about it, I just don't get it.

Admittedly, I had never heard of Jen Agg or The Black Hoof restaurant before I started to hear all the buzz for I Hear She's a Real Bitch. I had no idea what to expect, but as a bit of a foodie, and a bit of a feminist, and a former resident of Toronto, I was intrigued. Besides, it's got a catchy title, Agg looks dead cool on the cover, and the publisher blurb said "A sharp and candid memoir from a star in the restaurant world, and an up and coming literary voice." I'm a total sucker for a good publisher blurb, even though I used to write them and should know better.

So I came to this with limited expectations, but a desire to believe that she's probably not a bitch, and I thought I was pretty open minded.  However, a few chapters in I began to wonder about it being described as a memoir.  In my mind the difference between memoir and autobiography is that the essence of memoir is the self-reflective voice.  This voice not only tells you what happened, but how the narrator feels about the experience after reflecting on it with what one hopes is honesty and self-awareness.  Autobiography is much more a linear description of events, starting in childhood and moving forward.   With these definitions in mind, I felt that I Hear She's a Real Bitch, could be much more accurately described as a celebrity autobiography.

She begins by describing her childhood, growing up in Scarborough, and focuses on stories that prove both her precociousness and her strong need to rebel, which led me to my next thoughts on the book.  In all probably she is not a bitch, but she sure comes across as a bit of a narcissist. Throughout she shows an over the top tendency to describe herself as a woman of extraordinary good taste, intelligence, artistic ability, business acumen, and vision. Not that there is anything wrong for someone to go through life with a healthy dose of self-esteem. As she puts it herself, "I had spent my whole adult life believing in my infallibility, because I had to teach myself that I was just as capable as a man, despite all the subtle and not so subtle cultural signals to the contrary."  Yet, on the other hand there is something desperate sounding in her constant need for recognition and approval. The louder someone protests their accomplishments, the less inclined I am to believe them--I call this the "Trump Inversion."

As I moved further into the book I began to wonder if she was just trying to do a hatchet job on people who have disappointed her in the past.  She seems sharply aware of every time someone betrayed her, but simply glosses over her betrayal of others--just ask her high school best friend. There also seems to be a strong undercurrent of blaming others for her failures and taking full credit for her successes. It was her first husband's fault her first bar went bankrupt, and an amazing amount of stuff was her first chef/partner's fault. Yet in the end, I must admit there is more to the book than that.

At one point I thought it might be a lovingly produced promo piece for her restaurants.  She waxes poetic about every fixture, drink, dish, bar stool and strip of wall paper in all her restaurants. It reads somewhat like one of those glossy brochures for a new condominium development.  But again, I clearly don't get it, because in the end all the talk from inside the industry just left me with a desire to stop eating out and cook at home.  There is apparently way too much status seeking in the restaurant world for me to ever fully value and appreciate the experience I would be offered.

There is a breathlessness to her prose, that is sometimes charming but other times sounds like a ten year old trying to relate the plot of all the Star Wars movies in under ten minutes.  She speaks strongly about gender inequality, but with an innocence that leaves me with the impression she is completely unaware of the numerous waves of feminist action and theory that preceded her.  There is also a surprising amount of vulgarity, and I can't quite decide whether I think that is to establish her rebel credibility or her feminist creditably.

So in the end all I can say is that I just don't get it.

Two and a half smileys out of five. 😀😀😶